Speaking a foreign language is really fun. It is an amazing feeling to get passed that frustrating point of fumbling among the words you are trying to get out, passed mispronunciation, passed the long pauses needed to turn your native speech message into words you actually know in your target language. Oh, am I implying that I know what that is like? I'm sorry. I don't speak a foreign language, and I often tell people that I hardly speak English. However, I have had some glimmers of this amazing feeling, and the experience of making mistakes has helped me develop a better strategy for language learning. Let's walk through some of my issues because I think my failures can bring some of you a shortcut or two.
I don't want to sound stupid! - Mispronunciation and Grammar
Often times we forget that failure and mistakes actually help us learn. Wasn't it Einstein that said something about the person who has never failed never tried? Thus, just trying makes all the difference. All of those little failures lead up to success, especially with language. The only language we never had to try to learn was our native one, and even then there is quite a bit of learning. I think a lot of this fear comes from avoiding making errors and not wanting to sound 'stupid.' I know from trying to speak a language that exists in a vastly different linguistic realm than my native one that it is inevitable that one will sound ridiculous. The further away your target language is from your native language, the more ridiculous you are going to sound, which means that you will fail more and make more mistakes before you reach success. Don't let that stop you! The sweet feeling of communicating with someone in your target language triggers a massive endorphin overhaul on any negative feelings you have about failure and mispronunciation.
Will somebody talk to me? - Exposure and use
When I started studying French in high school, I didn't know a single person that spoke the language. Taking it over Spanish was a direct result of my delusion that I would study abroad. Little did I know that exposure and use are great influences when one is trying to learn a foreign language. So, target a language that you can use in your community. If you want to go beyond that, there are amazing resources online that pair you with native speakers (italki, Lang-8, LingQ, etc.) that connect you with people using video chat to assist you. Ask a question, have a conversation, exchange languages, etc. Learning is possible because resources are available if you seek them out. Now, why are you seeking them out?
You need a little motivation - Intentions
Unless you are the polyglot, Benny Lewis, or the boy-wonder hyper polyglot, Tim Doner (YouTube video that will awe you here), you aren't learning a language for the sake of learning a language. You have a reason, and many of us started in high school when the reason was "because it's required." Now you are an adult and nothing is required in the foreign language department. Maybe there are some people in the kitchen at the restaurant you work who speak Spanish. Maybe you are second or third generation European and you want to speak to some relatives. Whatever the case, you get it. There needs to be some internal motivation for your learning that second language. If you don't have a reason, you need one.
How the hell am I supposed to remember that? - Memory
This is an obstacle for anything, people's names at a dinner party, let alone language learning. It's usually the component to language learning that makes people think, "I'm just not wired with the language gene." That is nonsense. There is no language gene, only hard work and persistence. Just like an athlete reaches the professional realm by perfecting technique and strategy, so too does a language learner shorten their learning curve by developing a system that works for them when they target a new language. For example, if I have never learned a foreign language (and I haven't) I am not going to know where or how to begin when I decide to learn a new language. Conversely, when someone who knows two or three languages at a conversational level targets a new language, they learn faster because they have the experience of acquiring language. Now you are thinking, "But how?" Let me offer what I've learned.
Your study buddy ... on crack! - The Internet
In today's technocratic society it is no wonder that the Internet has made life easier for language learners. All kinds of study assistants are popping up almost daily (Quizlet, Memrise, Anki, Duolingo, etc.). These Internet based forums do everything from provide a new way to study flashcards (Spaced Repetition System, or SRS) to combining learning styles into a game-type platform to accommodate for all types for learners (Memrise and Duolingo). I really enjoy Memrise because it uses varied SRS and a game-type platform that has home computer and mobile versions for all operating systems. Most of these helpers are going to have mobile apps, so instead of playing Candy Crush you can improve your Spanish vocabulary. Also, a great resource for memory methods is Gabriel Wyner's book, Fluent Forever: How to Learn Any Language Fast and Never Forget It (check out the book and his website here).
Make a pleasurable routine out of it - Your system
It is really important to think about what you want to accomplish with language learning. I think about this everyday because I teach English, live in Thailand and have a Brazilian girlfriend. That's two languages to learn and one to teach, all three of which require a healthy understanding of each of the aforementioned aspects of the learning process. As a teacher I try to use topics (which isn't always easy when you teach 15-16 year old teens) that appeal to my students to disguise course material so it seems more enjoyable. Likewise, as a language learner, I approach learning Thai through my day to day experiences and what I enjoy to do or talk to others about. What do I need to say? Who am I communicating with? Then I take baby steps with vocabulary and test it in conversation.
Now get out there and use a foreign language! At least watch a movie in your target language and turn on the English subtitles. You'll surprise yourself with how much you already know. Communicating with others is really an exciting experience, so find a language you can use, set realistic goals, implement methods that help you retain it, maintain your practice, and most importantly, have fun!